It came, we saw, He conquered.

No, not the G-man–[I mean come on, the weather was AWEsome!!]–LANCE! It was his first marathon and he finished 26 seconds short of 3 hours! woohoo!!

Okay. Now that we got that over with, let’s talk about the Real Heroes. The people that have actual jobs and still manage to train for months AND get up at like 6am to run/walk a real-life, shin splitting, no time for TV, nipple bleeding?!?, all Five Boroughs marathon.

The BRB, however, are perturbed by this concept of RUNNING 26.2 miles.

I mean, yeah it probably takes a while to get from Verrazano Bridge to Central park, but with a Bus, a Ferry, and a Train,

it comes to about 2 hours=the time it took the fastest runner to finish! So why do they do it, you ask? Rather, WE ask. Well, here are a few, possible reasons.

National pride?


Political advertising?

Free water?

drinking water

Missed Halloween?

marathon halloween

CBGB’s closed?

Want to give away old gloves and sweatshirts, but don’t wanna trek ALL the way down to the Salvation Army?

marathon giveaways

It’s tough to say what the single highest-rated reason was this year**, but it will most definitely be different for next year [let’s just hope you make the lottery!] Nevertheless, we give kud0z to all.

 

–especially the last guy we saw walking thru while the marathon staff was cleaning up. Keep on truckin’!!

last runner/clean up

We guess it’s good to know that even our own neighbors can do amazing things if they set their mind to it and that not all heroes are using their [d]evil powers for flying. Unless…

marathon ireland

 

PEE ESS:

Thanks for leaving all the flattened cups on 4th Ave. and traffic on Restaurant Row.

marathon cup sweepingmarathon cup mess

**BEST MOMENT EVER–watching a WNBC correspondant [whose identity will be protected] interview Kim Alexis while running, BRB making a joke about him masturbating to her, and then he revealing to her that he had her poster on his wall as a young man.

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